1. How is a woman like a laxative? They both irritate the sh.it out of you.
2. What's the white stuff you find in women's panties? Clitty litter.
3. What's it called when a woman is paralyzed from the waist down? Marriage.
4. Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She was a woman.
5. Did you hear about the guy who finally figured out women? He died laughing before he could tell anybody.
6. Why do women close their eyes during sex? They can't stand to see a man having a good time.
7. What's six inches long, two inches wide, and drives women wild? Money.
8. Why is a poosay like a warm toilet seat? They both feel good, but you wonder who was there before you.
9. Why do women have periods? Because they deserve them.
10. What's love? The delusion that one woman is different from another.
11. How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart? When she starts her sentence with, "A man once told me..."
12. How are women and tornadoes alike? They both moan like hell when they come, and take the house when they leave.
13. What is easier to pick up the heavier it gets? Women.
14. How many men does it take to open a beer? None. It should be opened by the time she brings it.
15. What do women and screen doors have in common? The more you bang them, the looser they get.
16. What do you call a woman with an opinion? Wrong.
17. Why do women have smaller feet than men? So they can stand closer to the sink.
18. How is a woman like an airplane? Both have cockpits.
19. Why are women like condoms? They spend 99% of their time in your wallet, and the other 1% on your dick.
20. Why don't women wear watches? There's a clock on the stove.
TheDevilsToll~
2. What's the white stuff you find in women's panties? Clitty litter.
3. What's it called when a woman is paralyzed from the waist down? Marriage.
4. Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She was a woman.
5. Did you hear about the guy who finally figured out women? He died laughing before he could tell anybody.
6. Why do women close their eyes during sex? They can't stand to see a man having a good time.
7. What's six inches long, two inches wide, and drives women wild? Money.
8. Why is a poosay like a warm toilet seat? They both feel good, but you wonder who was there before you.
9. Why do women have periods? Because they deserve them.
10. What's love? The delusion that one woman is different from another.
11. How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart? When she starts her sentence with, "A man once told me..."
12. How are women and tornadoes alike? They both moan like hell when they come, and take the house when they leave.
13. What is easier to pick up the heavier it gets? Women.
14. How many men does it take to open a beer? None. It should be opened by the time she brings it.
15. What do women and screen doors have in common? The more you bang them, the looser they get.
16. What do you call a woman with an opinion? Wrong.
17. Why do women have smaller feet than men? So they can stand closer to the sink.
18. How is a woman like an airplane? Both have cockpits.
19. Why are women like condoms? They spend 99% of their time in your wallet, and the other 1% on your dick.
20. Why don't women wear watches? There's a clock on the stove.
TheDevilsToll~
